getting shit off my chest.
So here’s some old shit: About two maybe three weeks ago I had to change lili’s sleeping place cuz of some crazy shit that I figured out. Every since she was just a baby she has had some sleeping problems just like every other child in the universe. If she was teething or going through a growth spurt, sick, hungry or just every kind of kid thing there is she would wake up in the middle of the night. I would watch her on the video monitor that I have and then I would go and make her ok. I used to see these floating balls on the monitor sometimes but I always thought that it was just a moth or some kind of bug in her room flying around, you know the normal stuff, maybe some dust or something. Never really worried about it. Well a few months back we got some cable channels on the TV for free and I was watching off and on this program about ghost hunting, I cant find the name of it anywhere I think it was on the A&E channel or maybe lifetime, something like that. Anyways to get to the jist of it, these ghost hunters would take there little camcorders and their voice recorders into these supposed haunted places and video/tape these ghosts. You could actually see the ghost in the form of white balls floating around on the tapes. They would shoot across the screen really fast and sometimes they would float.
One night Lili woke up screaming bloody murder, saying MOMMY, MOMMY, NO! NO!. As soon as I heard her say MOMMY I flicked on the video feed on the monitor to see if she was awake or not. That is when I saw it; there was this white dot on the screen flying back and fourth across lili. All of a sudden something clicked in my brain, I had seen these same things somewhere before, on the TV. These were the same white looking balls I had seen on the ghost show. All within a nanosecond I had the realization and I was off the couch and flying into her room. I turned on the light and scooped her up. I couldn’t let her sleep in there anymore, so I made a bed for her in my room and that was the last she has slept in her room since.
Now she has a toddler bed that is so cute, its Disney Princess, at the foot of my bed. She has been sleeping the whole night through every since, except for when Austin snores too loud then she will wake up, but she goes right back to sleep.
I have talked to several people about it and they all believe me, my mom, becca next door, elliott, Austin, jess, Elaine, Laura, they all say the same thing, don’t put her back in there and that I did the right thing by getting her out.
Some newer shit: The day before Christmas I think it was or maybe it was the day before that I was on the phone with Laura and she was telling me that she talked to cici the day before when she couldn’t get a hold of me when she was bored. She said that we needed to talk, I thought to myself, great here comes some more shit. Well not to my surprise there was drama, apparently cici told laura that I was talking shit about laura. I laughed. Laura then proceeded to tell me that cici proclaimed that I had told her Laura tried to commit suicide before her and lance got married cuz of the wolf thing ( something like that) It was ridiculous and I was laughing. I was like “ok, why would I say that? It doesn’t even make good sense.” Then there was the thing about how Laura’s marriage was in trouble before they left because cici was so skinny and pretty. psht. I was in awe. “Where is this coming from?” I asked Laura? There was something else too but I can’t remember what it was right off hand. When Laura was done telling me these things I was like “For starters, you know everything that I have told cici about you cuz I would always tell you everything the next day when I talked to you on the phone whenever me and cici hung out. Besides what I tell her is nothing that I haven’t already told you, or that I wouldn’t have a problem telling you.” On top of that I was thinking to myself, I would come up with better stuff to start shit with.
So me and laura kept on talking about stuff and I pretty much laughed it all off and we pondered why she would try and start shit now.
I was kind of piffed since this was not too long after cici had done the livejournal thing. I wasn’t mad about the livejournal thing but I was a little offended. It doesn’t matter why she ixnayed me, I understand it is her journal and all of that stuff, but you know even with the best of intentions it still felt like a slap in the face and anyone who says that it shouldn’t can kiss my ass, cuz guess what they don’t know what the fuck they are talking about and they are probably not the one being kicked off. Anyways that is neither here nor there. Plus I am allowed to have my fucking feelings just like everybody else, don’t tell me that I cant feel hurt when you’re the one saying people should be able to do what they want. Can we say hypocrite?
So anyways that same day I am over at McKinney’s house and Joe and cici are there, instead of confronting cici at their house, which was neither the place nor the time for things like that, I did what any respectful person would do, you know the old saying if you don’t have anything nice to say then don’t say anything at all, well that is pretty much what I did. She said something about Adrianna and I replied tried to talk and make the conversation nice but that ended up being all that was said.
Then for new years everyone was supposed to go over to McKinney’s again. Austin tells me that Joe and cici are staying home cuz things are too weird between us. Being the person that I am, not wanting things to be all bad for everyone to hang out and wanting to finally clear the air of what all was going on, I tried to call and figure things out, but Joe had too many calls to handle and asked me if he could call me back. So I waited, Austin in the meantime called and talked to Joe and he never once asked to speak to me and never called me back. So I figured well I guess they don’t want to hang out, that is fine its their loss, whatever, I didn’t do anything wrong nothing negative was said or done so if this is how they want to handle things then ok what ever. I’m not at a loss for friends and even if I was it still wouldn’t matter, they are leaving in like three months and I am leaving in seven, so who cares, things have always been rocky in that acquaintanceship anyways.
